I am a little on the pensive side this evening. I just watched "Oprah Remembers Michael Jackson". I was prepared to be sad. I had every album from "Off the Wall"on up. My hubby and I fell in love during the "Thriller" years and actually- that album is one of the few that I kept when I pared down and donated most of my vinyl to a friend who was a DJ. The show really didn't make me sad until the end. If you are not an Oprah person or if you just didn't see it, she basically went through her 1993 interview with him- she showed a lot of it and commented where it was warranted. I saw the interview back then and the same thing struck me both times. This man- this musical icon of my generation was so very sad and lonely that you could feel it in his words and see it in his eyes. I find it a stark reminder that the people that we think should *have it all* may not be living as charmed a life as we think.
What really got me thinking was something Oprah said at the end of the show. She started with that she would always wonder; if she had reached out- not that it would have made anything different as far as what was going in terms of his death or anything but...She said that looking back she can see how profoundly lonely he really was and she thinks that at the time she was so caught up in the "We got the interview with Michael Jackson!" hoopla that she finished the interview and that was that. Then she went back to say- "Maybe if I had reached out- I would feel better about this moment." I took that to mean (and I could be wrong- though I am a huge fan we are hardly BFF's) that watching that interview and not having made that gesture was a missed opportunity in her life. She can see how sad and lonely he was and she was so caught up in her own "thing" that she did nothing about it and now regrets that she didn't make the effort beyond the interview to get to know him and perhaps alleviate some of that loneliness.
I mentioned during my 42 days the ripplemakers in our lives. I sit here and wonder now, after watching that show, how many opportunities have I missed? How many times have I been so caught up in my own "stuff" that I missed the opportunity to reach out to someone in need? I have worked pretty hard at getting past the point in my life where I let whatever is going on at this time consume me, but I still have far to go in that respect. So how can I make myself more aware of what may be going on around me and more in tune with what is going on with other people? Is it a matter of becoming more selfless rather than selfish? Any suggestions? Definitely something to think about.