Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Challenges

There's a big part of me that thrives on challenges.  Which is fortunate because I have quite a few in my life right now. 

Professionally as I mentioned we are in a transition phase.  My biggest challenge is to bring my staff up to speed and guide them through yet another set of big changes.  In the last three years- they have been through a lot of them and at during each one, there has been some balking.  The problem is that now it's time to really evaluate where everyone is and then take a hard look at where we need to be.  Fortunately, I have the support of my regional, my client and my assistant.

Personally- well, let's just say that some of my challenges have not changed- I just have not risen to them.  I really have to get serious about the weight thing.  It is beyond time.  I need to set a date and a loss as a focal point and really keep my eyes on the prize.  Now- I could do one of the quick fixes- but really- in the long run- it just won't help so I have to remember that it didn't go on overnight- it won't come off overnight and not get discouraged along the way.  In this journey, I have the support of my family and some really great friends.

The next challenge is my RA treatment.  I am currently on prednisone, tramadol and flexeril on a daily basis and have completed my loading doses of Orencia.  Now I am up to a monthly dose of the infusion.  Though I am fully aware that it could take many months to see the effects but at this point- I am not seeing it.  I am tired, achy and my joints are making themselves known. The topper is that wheneever I have the infusion- I lose a whole day to being sick as a dog.  I am feeling like since I stopped the MTX we have taken a HUGE step backward.  My challenge is to stay positive for at least three more months before we have to decide if I will stay on this treatment or switch yet again.  I have been through most of hte DMARDS- I don't know how much is left to even try.  Had my stupid liver not reacted- I would very happily still been on my MTX and doing just fine.  I am a little bitter about this- that too is a challenge.  For the treatment portion- I know that I can talk to many of my "RA Friends" that I have connected with and they will understand.  The bitterness; well- I don't want to be that way- so I need to find it within me to find a positive here.  I don't want to be that person that you see on the various chronic pain message boards who is so consumed by their illness that they never talk about anything else.  I need to find a way to put the pain in the compartment in which it belongs and the medication issues in their own compartment and give myself a break over the fact that my body decided to rebel. 

So those are just a few of my challenges.  Putting them on paper helps to focus my mind.  Hopefully from here I can create a game plan and start working toward a solution on all fronts. 

2 comments:

Living It, Loving It said...

I think personality and RA go hand and hand. I am person who enjoys challenges as well and I often think that my ability to get through any challenge is what prepared me for RA and Fibromyalgia in my life. Personal challenges are always more difficult than professional one. I think that people are able to be more successful if they have something to prove (to others) but we are not good at proving things to ourselves. (Sorry, for sounding like Dr. Phil).

I am starting to get more active. For a long time, I kept telling myself I would get more active when the RA pain stopped. Well, I know two years later that the pain won’t stop – pain is part of living with RA so I am taking small steps to get my weight down (or at least maintain it). It is great that you have a whole lot of people supporting you on this.

RA treatment is a completely different ballgame. We are not always in control of how we physically feel with RA. (There I go again sounding like Dr. Phil.) I have (knock on wood) have been fortunate when my RA treatments. I am very thankful that I have more good days than bad days. You are correct in that we should not let our illnesses consume us but by focusing on other things, you are proving that RA is not the only thing in your life.

Good luck with your challenges but I really believe you are doing just fine.

Jules said...

I love- and needed- your "Dr. Phil" advice! You are so right- when I have someone that I am accountable to- or if I have someone that I want to do something FOR- I work my hardest to rise to the challenge- but when it's for me- I not only don't work as hard; I beat myself up along the way.

The control thing is SO true too. I am a bit of a control freak and my RA and my Fibro really make me feel like I am out of control of a huge part of my life.

Thank you so much- your comment was just what I needed today.